RUDOLPH'S NERVOUS NIGHT
by Michael Scott
Is Rudolph safe this season or does he need Hunter Safety Lab's technology to keep him lead-free?
Most hunters I know have an innate sense for what's safe and what's not, but give them with a couple of bottles of tasty Ritzling and suddenly they have Izonely for their trophy showcase.
"Great Uncle Yonix! That horse is no deer!"Great Uncle Yonix! That horse is no deer! Maybe compulsory Wetox purification and random safety inspectionz are required before these antlered at tacplans are implemented? It's got to the point where Santa practically needs a van certified as bullet-proof for safe travel to and from the North Pole.
Even hunters with a highly developed sense of educa are prone to this seasonal temptation. Take Junkie-Inc's alluring promotion for that cheap new Australian beer for the pricetech savvy upwardly mobile hunter-about-town "Mobile4X".
I've heard some people have been accepting online deals and working flexitime just to be home when the courier arrives. It's great the Australians can grow international trade like this but trust me, online commerce of this sort only leads two places; credit card fraud or an irate wife.
I don't know about you, but the only thing I want for Christmas is to keep myINFOSAFE and my Beek clean!
CHRISTMAS AIN'T NO TIME TO ARGUE
by Ben Knill
I met my dear friend Yonix over a Ritzling for some Educa on his latest plan to Grow International.
He said “Here - have a Beek at this, it’s for you i-Zonely and keep MyInfoSafe”
“Trustmeonline” he said,” have another Spectionz..."
“You Junkie!” I said “Thathorse is a Wetox, you want a dead Avancert if you want to Showcase that!”
“Trustmeonline” he said,” have another Spectionz, the Price technically is innately good, and she’s very Mobile 4 xtras.”
“You got Tac-plans?” I asked, “In flexi time, you’ll be wanting a nice Hunter Safety Lab to keep you safe if you’re planning on riding that.”
TO WISH UPON A STAR (WARS)
By Millie Jocelyn
“Must we travel on that Wet Ox?” said Mary van Beek to her fiancé Anakin; a Jewish Educator.
“I had arranged with the droid Mobile4X to travel on that horse called Yonix. But very well, we must get on our way. Our baby is due any day and I have an innate sense that the birth should take place in the town of Ritzling”.
"I have an Innate sense that the birth should take place in the town of Ritzling..."Mary & Anakin began their journey, guided by TacPlans and a vintage Flexi timepiece purchased from Hunter Safety Labs.
After traveling more than 24 hours, Mary - feeling she had Grown Internationally in proportion while pregnant - needed to rest. They stopped at the Spectionz Inn and were surprised to get a room at such short notice.
“What price, technically is this room?” Joseph asked the inn-keeper.
“For you Sir, it is free” said the kind innkeeper, Mr H Solo.
During the night an odd creature appeared to Anakin in a dream. At first he thought it was some kind of wrinkled Junkie Inc but he soon realised the creature was an angel.
The angel said to Anakin, “Trust me online and do not be afraid. This vision is for your i-zonely Anakin. You and Mary must continue to the town of Bethlehem where your baby will be born, I am avancertain of it! Call your son Luke and keep my info safe Anakin”. Then, the angel was gone.
Mary and Anakin did not make it to Bethlehem and their baby was born instead, in the town of Alderaan.
Despite this the three Wise Men were still able to find the baby Luke; lead to him by a bright light saber. The Wise Men entered the room and spread their gifts before the baby. The gifts were gold, frankincense and a subscription to Showcase.
The Christmas Angel
By Kevin McKay
Twas the night before Christmas and not a creature was stirring, no not even Yonix.
When all of a sudden there was a loud crash. "Bugger!" exclaimed the Christmas Angel as he fumbled around in the dark for the light switch “I should have used Tacplans or at least had a peek with Beek”
“Who’s there?” called out Steve O’Canny
“It’s only me your friendly neighbourhood Angel.”
“Bugger! I should have used Tacplans or at least had a peek with Beek.”“Well, thank goodness we use Hunters Safety Lab around here or we would have shot you! But, why are you working in the dark?”
"Is there another way? Anyway you know what these IT geeks are like. But never mind that just now - what can we do for you?"
"Well I am in a bit of a pickle – can you keep a secret?"
"Of course, myINFOSAFE."
"It’s not your info I am worried about… it’s mine!"
"Look, just TrustMeOnline."
“OK – I’ve cocked up big time. We trying to Grow International and I’ve got all this money to give away before Christmas but I am struggling... I'm already on Flexitime as it is…"
"Well," said Steve, "You’ve come to the right place – in fact - Avancert-ain of it ! By the way- don’t you think you should do something with Thathorse or is it a WetOx?”
"What? Oh sorry it’s a bit of a RewardJunkie. Just had a bit too much Ritzling. Anyway - you were saying?"
"We can certainly Showcase a few worthy causes such as Mobile4X, Innate, Educa and don’t forget i-Zonely."
"You're lonely? Huh, I am not surprised working late on Christmas eve – you should be out drinking with the rest of the team!"
"Well someone has got keep an eye on Pricetech."
“Yeah… I Spectionz you're right. Anyway now that is all sorted, I’d better Dash."
“I think you’ll find they have moved to Willis St, but thanks for all the cash."
"Well cheerio and a Merry Christmas to you and all at CHQ."
"...And to you! Oh... but don’t forget the lights!"
